Let me say first, setting boundaries is not disrespectful, bad or wrong. In fact, emotionally healthy people set personal boundaries.

Educate people in your life about your boundaries.

Calmly and respectfully inform them about how they can and cannot behave toward you and speak to you. Let people know what feels warm, kind and respectful and what doesn’t.

Let people know what your limits are.

This actually gives people in your life the security of knowing your relationship guidelines and eliminates their fears about how they should behave with you.

Important Tip: The failure or inability to set boundaries may result in numerous, unfortunate circumstances:

  • Your inability or unwillingness to set boundaries and limits will most likely result in your partner not being clear about the words and actions that feel good to you and make you feel loved, and those that may hurt your heart.
  • Building walls to protect yourself actually blocks the closeness between you and your partner, and prevents you both from extending and receiving loving interactions.
  • Your confusion or ambivalence about setting boundaries will most likely result in your partner being confused about the words and actions that feel good to you and make you feel loved, and those that may hurt your heart.

Setting and maintaining your own boundaries and honoring the boundaries of others are skills that can be learned.

It takes mindfulness, intention and practice.

Be patient with yourself as you learn and practice these important and valuable skills. It is worth it–And so are you!

Original Content by Jackie Black, Ph.D., BCC
www.DrJackieBlack.com~ DrJackie@DrJackieBlack.com